Lizards Freezer Contents

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jj
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Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by jj »

I'd go for the poacher theory- we had a resident lizard in Spain, and it'd nick our Tapas every evening.
Mind you, we had a crow that'd come down for his breakfast, and a tortoise in the toilet, too, so the moral is, you never can tell.
Hey, ho.......
"a harmless drudge, that busies himself in tracing the original, and detailing the
signification...."
Lizard
Posts: 6228
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by Lizard »

I eat a lot of game pie, mostly nintendo and playstation variety,s, although I had an x-box with some beetroot last week, and it was very tasty, came with it,s own chips!
The only thing I have ever poached is an egg, by the time I,d taken the lead out of it, there was just some smeggy yolk dribblin down me chin.
Last year Ms Lizard was strolling along the front at St Ives eating a ice cream, when a herring gull swooped and nicked the fuckin lot, I threw a pasty at it, and shouted 'cunt' loudly, and was promply arrested for animal cruelty, and using obscene language in public, she has still nor recovered from the 'gulling' and now walks round with a strong cardboard box on her head..................oh the fun we have!

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jj
Posts: 28225
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by jj »

Them sheep is deadly, they can kill a man by butting him. Makes goats seem a lot better, eh?
No- I suppose not.

We have herring-stealing Burger Gulls round here. It's because all those clinically obese kids have now learnt to fight them off by hitting them with the free toys they get with the burgers. So the poor birdies have to go to the Estuary now to get the few scrawny herring left behind by all the illegal imigrants.
Isn't Natural Selection wonderful?
"a harmless drudge, that busies himself in tracing the original, and detailing the
signification...."
jj
Posts: 28225
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by jj »

Your eggy disaster results from the modern practice of feeding chickens on industrial swarf, which means that the shells of the eggs the chickens lay is really thin, like tinfoil- although it does mean that you can now catch them by using a large magnet.
Unfortunately they also taste like zinc, which as any mongoose will tell you, doesn't taste very nice.

Did Mrs L meet Simple Simon, or the Pieman, BTW? I bet his game pies only contained Ludo and Chess, him being the old-fashioned nursery-rhymey type sort of chap...............them gulls eating ice-cream certainly explains the appearance of their doo-doos, it must go right through them...
"a harmless drudge, that busies himself in tracing the original, and detailing the
signification...."
Lizard
Posts: 6228
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by Lizard »

The gulls in Cornwall are trained by Columbian drug dealers, they are trained to swoop on anything white, so never walk the streets in just your underpants, well obviously in your case there,s no problem, there not attracted by purple and brown..

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jj
Posts: 28225
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: Lizards Freezer Contents

Post by jj »

Lizard wrote:
> The gulls in Cornwall are trained by Columbian drug dealers

How do they manage that, then?
Cornish gulls (possibly Siberian, if they've migrated a bit), Spanish-speaking drug overlords, either way not too fluent in the Romance languages.......
Do they meet up at Berlitz? Or is there a Linguaphone 'Basic Birdie Drug-Running for Dagoes' course?
"a harmless drudge, that busies himself in tracing the original, and detailing the
signification...."
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