Does anyone here ever have sex?

A place to socialise and share opinions with other members of the BGAFD Community.
the Monkey Wrencher

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by the Monkey Wrencher »

In short lads:

There's a whole world of sexy ladies out there.

They enjoy casual conversation.

Wine and roses.

Laughter.

Giggles.

They'll accept a man that it is good, over a muscle boy with a six pack you can crack bottles on.

Your VHS object of desire doesn't care.

Will never give a fuck.

Respect the porn. Love the porn.

BUT live your life.

Peace Out.

Read the article 'Pornomoungous'

God Bless

Officer Dibble

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by Officer Dibble »

Well personally, time permitting, I will occasionally indulge myself and put aside an afternoon to spend in the sumptuously ample bosoms of my favourite escort girls who, I'm gratified to report, smoke a seriously mean beef. Wheyhey!

Apart from that all this is just another day at the office for me. Obsessed with porn? Absolutely not, the vast majority of contemory porn just leaves me cold. I have to force myself to watch nowadays. It's just an agreeably interesting and freeform way of making a living. I can please myself what and when I shoot and what and when I sell. I have the last word over image and presentation; it allows me to indulge my creative pretentious without having to worry whether it's crap or not, because even if it is crap the punters will still buy it for the sexual imagery. There are also fringe benefits like frequently having some of the most famous and athletically pleasing dolly birds in the UK parading starkers round my gaff. Wheyhey!

From my point of view, yes, porn is socially isolating me. But only in the way that any small business or executive type job can isolate you. Folks in these positions can't down tools at 5 O'clock. I'm often editing pictures, brochures, movies, websites, DVD's etc at 1:30 AM, there's no time for going to the pub or even watching TV - especially if some forumite has taken issue with anything I've said and I have to spend an hour sorting them out and setting them straight! You have to be totally committed to the job you are doing or it just won't work.

I agree about the sense of community - this is the cyber equivalent of visiting your favourite bar of an evening and knowing that there will be intelligent like minded folks there who you can shoot the breeze with. You even get a few good-natured nutmegs that sit in the cyber corner, by the cyber space invaders machine, tittering away amongst themselves, talking total bollocks. Just like in a real bar. You don't take them seriously, but always say "Hi" and take comfort from their presence as you gravitate towards those who are invariably at the centre of more intellectually nourishing and stimulating debate....Shit! Is that the time? I must get some work done...

Dibble.
steve56

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by steve56 »

you sound like a lucky guy dibble,whats the secret of your success
Lizard

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by Lizard »

Most of us just get on with life Wrench, and dont think about it as deeply as you do, your the type that probably spends more time fantasizing about other folks sex lives, cos you dont have one yourself! right? as Joe says your a troll, either become a regular and contribute or go somewhere else, and stop mithering.
Officer Dibble

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by Officer Dibble »

I don't know Steve. I'd like to say it's all due to my astounding intellect, dazzling charisma and general savvy. But the truth is one day I was digging ditches, then the next thing I knew I was wearing Armani suits, driving large German automobiles and taking Teresa May out for lunch. That's just the way it happens sometimes.

Dibble.
Shaun?

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by Shaun? »

Yes, I do and i'm watching myself and a few others on the job with Chrissie, Sandie & Autumn. Worryingly John Mason is amongst a load of naked men.

the Monkey Wrencher

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by the Monkey Wrencher »



Lizard, Steve56, Dibble, Shaun, JJ et al,

My dated contribution to all things UK sex related. I'd be grateful to hear what you all think. I'm guessing a negative response?

Lizard

Re: Does anyone here ever have sex?

Post by Lizard »

I refer the Hon Gentleman to my previous post, many people lurk on this site reading the various musings, and thats fine, but dont try and anaylise it Wrenchy, it is what it is, a site dedicated to Adult Films and the girls who 'star'in them, nothing more nowt less! The general flow of the site, the 'cut and thrust' gets interupted now and again by some psuedo hack from a Tabloid, or a wannabe C4 documentry film maker, wanting to know what makes everyone tick, but generaly trying to make mischief, so as I say, best not to look for anything too deep, you wont find it, and why would you want to. unless your life,s so totally boring, you have to get into someone else,s.
BTW, I read your page, it was very bland.
Monkey's Care Worker

FAO: Lizard

Post by Monkey's Care Worker »

Lizard,

Surely 'broadsheet' rather then 'tabloid' old bean?

That said the Monkey Wrencher sends full apologies, as he's been spending too long on the bong of late and hasn't been compliant with his mental medication.

He also thanks you for your feedback, despite finding the term 'bland' a touch non descriptive. 'Bollocks', 'bigoted', 'wrong', 'way off the mark', 'utter shite' maybe; but 'bland'?

I'll make sure he goes to bed now and never asks any questions again, for fear for offending the delicate sensabilities of the regular forum folk.

Keep on keeping on homez.

Lizard

Re: FAO: Lizard

Post by Lizard »

Good, make sure you take his wrench off him, and it,s about time he watched film no 4, I suggest Bens Royal Reamers, with a good bottle of port and some nachos....... bloody lurkers, bla bla bla..
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