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9.40a.m. Easter Monday-holiday...have run out of out of chocolate,beer,wine
only spirits are left

Outside its 25 sunny with a sea breeze at about 5 knots

The breeze from my arse is running at about 20 knots(so tony greig would tell me if he was here with his measuring devices)

The ditch can wait....its the perfection protection against burglars

cheers
B....OZ

Its not a ditch is it? Its a moat. You will no doubt be installing a port cullas soon you silly wiper of other peoples bottoms.

I will be firing cows from catapults to infest your domain.

Glad to hear you have a 20 knot gale blowing from your arse, I have a 50 knot pile of shite blowing out of my mouth. But it is treatable.

Hard a starboard Captain Haddock.

Magoo........Hey Im Sick I need Help

Your condition is known as, 'Beerflyingoutofyerarse' syndrome, by proxy, and is treatable with a spell in prison and some charity work, trust me I,m a Dr.

Thanks Doc. I feel better now. But I still dont understand why you insist on an anal exam as a first option. I hope your not an audiance member from Vets In Practice. You are arent you? Dirty bastard!

I hope your not one of those preevert docs that we see on Kilroy.

Dont mention that twat K to me, I did a full labotomy on him, and never got paid, luckily it didn,t work, but you win some...... laugh or burn!

Thats Brummies for yer. I hate Robert too. He is a right cock. Is he from Aston?

I dont know, his dental records say, Solihull,!!

And his plastic surgery bill say,s Bournville!

He certainly looks like a wheel tapper and cocoa shunter from the Bournville sidings.

He packs fudge and no mistake.

Are you implying he's a Quaker?
BTW, I think Brum's a wonderful city.

But unlike the above religionists, I'm allowed to lie.........