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Sorry , though we were going to do a couplet per person limerick. Didn't realise it wqas 70s night and we were all going to have a Dead Parrot Sketch reciting contest .

We should probably have a limerick impro, FB. Not that I'd be able to provide much in the way of rhyme.

Well, then: haiku.
We all talk bollocks, anyway.........so let's do it 'culturally'.

I don't do poetry. It's like maths and backgammon---I just don't understand the rules.

I am sending my personal therapist over to you, she is kind, a good listener, great arse, nice rack, and a sexual deviant, oh! and she bakes her own scones, and has a off licence, she read your post and thinks she can help you!, me! I,m not so sure.
Any road up, where have you been you toe rag, the Greenham common demonstration finished years ago, and there,s no sale at Homebase, or even Homobase....or have you been to the D Day Landings ceromony, as wing commander JJ ?

Limericks are larf although they can say something about the human condition but thats not mandatory .
Everyone should know about the young man of Kent , and that poor young lady of Leicester .
Haikus are brilliant , so elliptical, just like Hirohito addressing the nation after WWII and noting that " The war has turned out not neccesarily to our advantage " makes our Sir Humphreys look like novices .
I dont know if I could write a Haiku , maybe about moths ?

I admire the skill and discipline of the haiku, encapsulating an idea in a few syllables. Just don't think I can do it.

Do what I do: cheat.

There's a thought.

Yep, I was there on the beaches.......

Alas, I didn't have the Seniority to have a Wing of my own to command: all they'd give me was a claw and a beak, and I had to make do with bossing them around instead.
Still, we took out 13 Jerry pillboxes, armed only with a garden rake and a stuffed Mexican fruitbat- the German millinery industry took a mortal blow that day, I can tell you........
My memoir of the time, "From Caen to Amiens, with a Pointy Stick, Shouting Very Loudly" will be available shortly (I say shortly, although it's 12,002 pages long) from all good booksellers, and quite a few bad ones as well.


Can that therapist make a decent cuppa? If not, tell her to fuck off.
I can't be having people who can't brew up proper.