Neil the Wheel

[magoo]

You dont need an application form. You just turn up at the barracks in (gay)Paris and tell them you want to join. They then ask you if you are wanted by the police in Britain. As long as your not wanted for murder they welcome you. Once you sign up they kick the shit out of you and force you to learn french. Its called earning your white cap. Basic training. Trust me I know. You then get posted to French Guyana to guard a daft space installation and get bitten by various creatures. Then you abscond back to Britain and face the music. And you then realise Britain is not so bad.