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Very sorry to hear of your problems Jay, only those who have been there can truly understand how you feel.
Hang on in there mate,
Geoff

Money is not the route to all happiness - but it sure as hell helps. The thought of being free of all debt is great.... however, money does buy you freedom, and I'm the kind of guy that appeals to. Withdrawing from the rat race is something I need to do, the pisser for me is being prevented from doing this just for the sake of beurocracy.

You sound like you do need to explore your personal issues, I have mentioned Tony Robbins, that kind of thing will definitely help you. You need to address these things, find what the wold make you really happy and go for it. For all my problems, and I do have grave misgivings about the world we live in and the stupidity of it all I am inwardly calm and in touch with the real me, which is sadly something most peole never do for themselves.
Yes, there are a lot of misguided wankers about, they are everywhere. I have found though that there are also some genuinely amazing folk too - it's just that seem to be outnumbered!

We've all asked that question at some low point in our existence

This page has some interesting informative statements
relating to hatred,violence,depression in the world etc



If your financially successful I'd say taking the easy way out isn't an option.The fact that the can't bring yourself to do it says deep down you know that

I've always found doing things to make others happy reaps far more ongoing rewards than anything I've ever done for myself and the more connections you have in your community(doing free community service) the better your sense of belonging will be.While your working in your community you never know who you will meet.

Accumulating wealth for wealths sake never results in lasting happiness
Its what you spend it on....one of the most rewarding things I ever did,cost $AUS360 a year...sponsored a child in Zimbabwe....even today with the Mugabe regime running amok their community is surviving because of such assistance

So make the most of it and as another in this thread said...turn of the TV...don't read the papers....nothing but 90% Distorted Negative views of a world

Its no coincidence that theres a song titled "Horror Movie" which is about "The News"

Regular viewing can lead to a feeling of hopelessness IMHO

cheers
B....OZ

hmmmm u know this time of night/morning is by far the worst and hardest fucking time of all - fucking bollox I can tell u

Having spent 10 years dealing with similar shit to yours mate, the bottom line, as Liz says is, it isn't all bad, the good things in this world still outnumber the bad, you HAVE to find something to hold on to, a good friend of mine is Schozophrenic, living with that illness is pure hell, particulary for his family, he's been sectioned too many times, literally dragged out of his house by the old bill, spent Christmas day in hospital, you name it, and now is only kept under control by his jabs, but a nicer, more LOYAL guy you couldn't meet, there is far worse people coping, and coping well in appalling health situations out there mate, not talking to anyone, and keeping it all in will make it far worse for you, around Easter time, I had a problem with Zopiclone, a nasty fucking sleeping pill, after 2 weeks I had adverse reactions to it, meaning I couldn't sleep at all.. and spent 5 days and nights straight without a wink, not a catnap... nothing, even now I hate the transition from night to dark if I'm awake that early, just where you were at 2.am this morning, theres nothing more depressing hearing the news on the radio, every fucking hour, knowing what times the buses stop running, and when the cunts start again as you've laid there for so long not sleeping, every car, bus whatever outside sounds like a fucking tank going past, you don't have to go through this alone, post on here, I'm sure everyone will reply, ignore the idiots, it does pass, once you've hit rock bottom, there isn't no further down to go, and you can only go up, I spent 2 years indoors not going out, and hated everone, and everything, but now I don't hate anyone, people that do annoy you?, just have no feelings for them one way or the other, use the energy you waste on hating things, to do something you enjoy, hating yourself? your stuck with yourself for life, you gotta get used to it, someone, somewhere, even if you don't think it cares about you, and will miss you if you go, and it would be a shitty old mess you left behind, even if you don't care about yourself, there must be someone you do REALLY care about, and the energy your wasting hating everything?, use it to love them back, trust me it works

Well put Arnold, there is also the problem of SAD, a seasonal thing, MANY people suffer from it, I know a girl who uses a light box, you can get them from good chemists, you spend an hour a day under it, and it has the same effect as the sun, it replaces/stimulates certain chemicals in the brain, she swears by it, and to our friend who started this thread... you said " tell me something good" well some people on here obviously care enough about you to be bothered posting a reply, so think about that!!!! and as many have said, try and spend as much time and energy in looking for the good, as you do looking for the bad, and dont assume everyone on this forum is just an average joe, with no money or prospects....you would be very surprised.

It always sounds better coming from someone who has experienced the REAL lows and survived them

Some of the stories of survival against all the odds are remarkable

I watched a speech given last week at a press gathering by an American Doctor Fred Frese(a schizophrenic)-to say his story is remarkable is an understatement

Diagnosed as having schizophrenia he has gone from being a patient to being in charge of that same Unit that treated him



A good friend of mine who took his own life age 27(leaving behind a Wife & a 6month old daughter) ten years ago would have been surprised to see the hundred and fifty people who turned up to say goodbye at his funeral

cheers
B....OZ

I'm with you there Deuce, one of my best mates took his own life just after 9/11, even made the loacl rag "Man takes own life through fear of war", which was totally out of proportion, he was just so depressed and wouldn't let anyone in, leaving behind a wife and young daughter, the turnout for his send off was huge, we even got to play his favourite Doors songs at his funeral, even the local cafe where he used to have his breakfast every day sent a huge boquet of flowers, even if you don't care about yourself, you HAVE to care about someone, as it will give you more than a reason to get up in the morning

Depression hits us all and feels like hell, but you DO get through it and look back at wondering why you were on the verge of slitting yer throat.
I was on prozac a few years back, and it did fuck all for me, so my mates got me through it, and I soon shook it off as you can.

Oh, making people happy is a good start, so why not start by knocking a few quid off yer DVDs and make us happy?

Perfect example Jay, when I spent 2 months in an admission ward almost 8 years ago, I was so fucking ill, I was on a liquid form of Chlorpromazine, a powerful antipsychotic, at nightime, I used to lay there fucking shaking, gripping onto the bars of the metal bedstead, what did I do? I closed my eyes and used to recite Pink Floyd songs in my mind, and it got me through it, that's why now, music means so much to me, I fucking saw it all in there, I used to wear a Pink Floyd t-shirt, the division Bell one? and a woman that had just been admitted, was convinced I was the devil, and I'd killed her baby! who had just died from cot death, causing her to have a breakdown and become Schizophrenic, the faces on my t-shirt were the image of the devil according to her! I'd wake up in the night, with her sitting on the end of my bed, saying she was gonna kill me, so now I'm not scared of the dark, I'm not scared of fuck all, as to me it dosen't get much more frightening than that, she never hurt me, she was just ill, I had to accept that, and when her "episode" was over? a lovlier woman you could never meet, and I stayed in touch with her for a while after she was released! like I said, you have to hold onto something, and I'm not fucking ashamed to admit anything, as I'm, just like anyone who's suffered any kind of mental health problems, made of exactly the same stuff as everyone else, and NO'ONE out there is immune from it