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.......and of course you knew all along that I was referring to Sir Dogginess' habit (aided and abetted by your good self) of consuming large anmounts of leftover takeaway.
Why is it never possible to have a normal conversation with you?
I try and be serious for once, about your beloved pet's dietetic misfortunes, and all I get is ocular nonsense. Anyone would think you were mad.

Well I suppose dogs can frequent men's toilets but read The Times? I think not. So I assume he's not referring to the canine species.

Mart

Do you mind?
My Dandie Dinmont eats his Doggie-Brek off a copy of the Times every morning, and he's a most well-informed young canine. I also have a stickleback that reads 'Hello', but we prefer not to talk about that..........

Well said jj, I think Mart,s a plant!! or at the very least a shrub, and no match for magoo when it comes to undercover work, even though he never sleeps, must be up all night practicing sermons...

It's all that having roots instead of feet.....I mean, look at all that trouble when the triffids came along, people dying and such, and the trains not running.
Thass what comes of humble vegetables getting ideas above their station. Like that Sir Geoffrey Howe.

Your getting paranoid Liz. Your obsession about plants and MI3 shrubs and MFI stuff is very odd. But I also am a bit mental so we have something in common.

Warble warble jibber jibber etc

I wasn,t born then! must have been horrid and spidery!

Who, Sir Geoffrey?
'Orrible, I'll grant you, but not particularly spidery. You want spidery, thass Mandelson: I bet his grandma was a red-kneed tarantula.

Not to mention the Angel Fish you have that reads the Sun. And the Neons who read the Daily Star.

I got an email from Fluffy(he reads the Guardian) and he seems a bit upset about your antics.

PS I never mentioned those damn terrapins who read the Daily Mail. Apparently they are worried about turtles moving in and seeking asylum ,

That Angel fish can't read: he just looks at the pictures. He gets irritated at the neons taking the piss out of him, but that's 'Star' readers for you.....
Fluffy got a bit miffed when I wouldn't fund a Support Group for all his ex-wives and tadpoles, the randy little sod. Why should I subsidise his extra-pondular activities?
Those terrapins are worse than the NF: they should all be put up against a wall and shot. Or made into Mock Terrapin soup.......