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DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 4:03 pm
by marcusallen
Chairman Miaow, J.Walker and myself, have had a lengthy discussion this afternoon, (at Boardroom level, I might add) and the consensus was that we form the DAQ. This impressive organisation stands for:
Daft Questions Answered.

Most Q's will be answered in person by The Chairman, herself (who else)?
I will attempt to stick my oar in from time to time and the Rt.Hon J.Walker will be present at all times to act as moderator/referee and legal counsel.

We now declare this meeting open.............................................

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:08 pm
by mutanthalibut
Who was/is the Boston Batwanger?

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:13 pm
by Jon
Great idea Marcus congratulations to the Chaircat for taking the lead can you please answer the following
How many eggs will I need to make a sponge cake
Does Theresa May do dishes

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:18 pm
by magoo
Why did the BBC give Lenny Henry a new series? He should have gone to America like Tracy Ullman where unfunny "comedy" is very popular.

He might have been vaguely amusing in 1984 but now he is dire. What is so funny about a fat man from Dudley doing silly voices and Jamaican pensioner impersonations. I am only watching it while waiting for Have I got News etc.

Oooookaaaaay!! (what a tedious catchphrase)

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:24 pm
by magoo
Just one more daft question for The Chairman Miaow.

Why do cats always fart silently? Dogs at least do loud ones so that the owner can leave the room and avoid breathing in noxious fumes and gasses of a potency that Saddam could only dream about.

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:30 pm
by Wink Wink
Is TV getting dull with all this pop idol, I'm a celeb' get me out of here, home improvements, what not to wear etc? Or do people REALLY find it interesting?

Sorry if that's two questions!

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:33 pm
by magoo
I thought you and S56 loved all that stuff?

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:44 pm
by Chairman Miaow
Hello you lovely young men, I will answer you questions in order:

Mutant: Have no personal knowledge of him, but my master was once incarcerated in a place called Walpole, Mass where one of the residents was the Boston Strangler (Albert de Salvo). Hope tis helps.

Jon: Entirely depends on size of said cake, could be between 3 - 33. Recommend duck eggs. (Pliease furnish precise details for scientific analysis)

Magoo: The BBC work in mysterious ways and I have to admit that EVEN I am not privy to them.
As for your second Q, I assure you that I only fart out on the patio because the combination of fumes indoors -with HIM-and Mr.Walker could be explosive, especially because HE is always lighting up things called fags(please don't take that wrongly).
With respect, as for DOGS(URGGGGRR) what the hell you expect from such uncouth beings.

Trust this advice solves your problems, but if not, Mr Walker says he has another solution.

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 5:51 pm
by Chairman Miaow
Mr WinkWink,
It is really very simple:
When you become a Pop Idol, they will re-locate you, improve your overpriced home, tell you what to wear/cook and you can then happily wander about (with great planning and forethought) and be A CELEBRITY.

Should be obvious!

Re: DQA

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2003 6:15 pm
by Lizard
Any tips on, how to keep sand out of your bell end in a sandstorm, am thinking of visiting the middle east next month.
thanks in advance,