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A friend who knows how much I like Frank Skinner showed me a feature in one of the local papers up here---the name of the author meant nothing to me, suggesting it's a syndicated piece---about our hero and his wonderful new sitcom. Now, before I go any further, I have to confess to seeing nothing of said show save the occasional trailer featuring the egotistical, unfunny gurner. The article was the worst piece of Arslikhan journalism, comparing his show to the likes of Steptoe And Son, going on about funny and dangerous the comedy was---and gave examples of three of the funnier jokes from it. Not one raised a smile from me.

The self-congratulatory quotes from the Brummie bore ended with him saying he didn't care what critics thought of the sitcom since he wrote it for himself. Hmmm. Wonder how he was able to see to write the scripts with his head so far up his own arse.

If I was to say any more about Mr Skinner, my head would probably explode with fury and frustration. Holden, it's over to you . . . .

I hate him too, but I ran out of burning invective in the Grantham thread.
Sorry.
I'll go chuck a brick through his window, will that do? And set fire to his house.
He has all the talent and charm of a talentless charmless graduate of the Naomi Campbell* Negative Charisma Academy, Spalding, Lincs (proprietor: L Grantham, B.A.(stard)).

[*Our lawyers have vetted this sentence to ensure that it in no way interferes with Ms Campbell's Human Right to be an obnoxious stuck-up ignoramus with a totally unjustifiably titanic ego in the privacy of her own, several and enormously expensive and tasteless, homes, despite her setting a precedent for taking the piss out of what was supposed to be serious piece of legislation designed to protect ordinary people with real grievances from government intrusion, and not just some litigatory money-making carte blanche ]

Having sat and watch 15 mins of this , I can only agree ......

Tie him face down naked and stick a plastic tube up his arse and encourage termites to nest .........

over to Holden ........

However did you manage to stick it for 15 mins? You must have the constitution of an ox. Or perhaps of Belgium.
And I have no doubt the RSPCA would prosecute on behalf of the lickle termites, who I understand are not entitled to Legal Aid, being as they are usually natives of foreign climes*.........


[* I am sure one of resident Legal Eagles and Associated Raptors will correct me on the relevant EU legislation regarding legal subsidy for Isopterans, other Insects and Hexapod Invertebrates in General.]

Chris Collins you fucking ugly Brummy cunt.
Getting paid fucking huge amounts for sitting on a sofa and talking bollocks with your Rabi bum-chum Baddiel with his face like a wildmans unshaved arsehole.
We know you take it in turns being each others bitch but for fucks sake pull your gappy toothed head out of your arsehole and accept the fact that you're an unfunny, slack jawed, skinny little man bitch who has run past his sell by date.
I hate your voice. It's like a whiney 14 year old saying "Why can't I have a giriirrlllfriend? Everybody else has got one."
It's cos your an ugly nob end with bad skin, bad teeth, a shit accent, and since you appeared on Stars In Their Eyes, you THINK you are the bastard son of Elvis Costello....MORE LIKE FUCKING LOU COSTELLO YOU SLAG.
Odd that Elvis had to change his name as well to try and pull the birds.
Shamus...SHAMUS,,,,SHAME US ALL YOU BASTARD.


I thank you.
By the way, I was goaded into this thread by the heathens that said "Over to you Holden."
You know my tourettes is in remission.

Thanks, Holden, you were much more eloquent than I could ever have been.