TROY - review
Posted: Sat May 15, 2004 4:04 pm
saw this Thursday night
STORY
When Paris (Orlando Bloom) elopes with Helen from her husband back to Troy he faces the wrath of King Brian Cox and the mighty Achilles (Brad Pitt).
PROS
- If you're a bird, Brad Pitt's frequently bare arse
- if you're a bloke, the actress who plays Helen.
- Decent battle sequences
- although an epic its just the right length
- impressive sets and effects
CONS
- If you're a bloke the actrees who plays Helen doesn't get her kit off
- Peter O Toole, Julie Christie, and a few other decent actors are merely coasting
VERDICT
Not the arse numbing bore I feared this to be - in fact it ended just as I started to tire of it. Loads of battles to gee everything along and not too much angst ridden dialogue. Not bad not great either. Orlando Bloom is mediocre at best and there is no great development in any of the character arcs. Its the battle sequences and special effects that keep it buzzing along. But it could have been a lot worse - it could have been Van Helsing!
STORY
When Paris (Orlando Bloom) elopes with Helen from her husband back to Troy he faces the wrath of King Brian Cox and the mighty Achilles (Brad Pitt).
PROS
- If you're a bird, Brad Pitt's frequently bare arse
- if you're a bloke, the actress who plays Helen.
- Decent battle sequences
- although an epic its just the right length
- impressive sets and effects
CONS
- If you're a bloke the actrees who plays Helen doesn't get her kit off
- Peter O Toole, Julie Christie, and a few other decent actors are merely coasting
VERDICT
Not the arse numbing bore I feared this to be - in fact it ended just as I started to tire of it. Loads of battles to gee everything along and not too much angst ridden dialogue. Not bad not great either. Orlando Bloom is mediocre at best and there is no great development in any of the character arcs. Its the battle sequences and special effects that keep it buzzing along. But it could have been a lot worse - it could have been Van Helsing!