Official Notice
Posted: Tue Apr 16, 2002 8:32 am
New measures have today been announced by the Home Secretary Mr. David Bumkid. As you will know we have all been at the mercy of the increasing number of young criminals at lose in our society. That we have so many younger criminals is in no small measure due to the fact that their parents have been watching an excessive amount of pornography of the most disgusting and vile kind. Bumkid has taken the bull by the horns and tackled this problem in his usual farsighted way.
The following measures will form part of our next election manefesto (check the spelling Alistair).
The source of the cesspit which issues this vile pornography will be stemmed at its roots. As from******(fill in dates here Bumkit) the broadcasting of prime ministers question time will be banned.
The vile exponents of this filth will be chased from our green and pleasant land and hounded to the ends of the earth,(can we get that nice Mr. Bush to give us a hand Alistair)? To this end Parliament will be disbanded forthwith and all members of this circle of vice will be interned in the new Group 4 home for the mentally incompetent.
All young criminals will be confined between the hours of 9am and 9pm to their prams and carrycots. Those already able to walk will be security tagged and kept on reigns which will at all times be attached to a big strong man from Group 4.
Newspapers who circulate the filth and bile issuing from the soon to be closed houses of depravity will be put out of business or handed over to that very nice Mr. ?Digger? Murdock (check the spelling of this idiots name Alistair)
Last and not least the Internet will be closed as from ******(an achievable date her please Bumkid, make sure it?s before the next election).
Should anyone have any doubt as to the seriousness of the problems we are facing I am sure that this notice, now posted on my official web broadcasting service, will make it clear to you all that I aim to tackle this problem and by fair means or foul, win the next election. Not that we need one as Tony Rules! OK
Note to Mr. Bias (Can?t we contact that Grope 4 Lot and get some bribes..er contributions to my fighting fund? Also get Digger to send that pretty wife of his round when Cherry?s at court) Tony
By the way, who is this Violent Storm, should I meether?
The following measures will form part of our next election manefesto (check the spelling Alistair).
The source of the cesspit which issues this vile pornography will be stemmed at its roots. As from******(fill in dates here Bumkit) the broadcasting of prime ministers question time will be banned.
The vile exponents of this filth will be chased from our green and pleasant land and hounded to the ends of the earth,(can we get that nice Mr. Bush to give us a hand Alistair)? To this end Parliament will be disbanded forthwith and all members of this circle of vice will be interned in the new Group 4 home for the mentally incompetent.
All young criminals will be confined between the hours of 9am and 9pm to their prams and carrycots. Those already able to walk will be security tagged and kept on reigns which will at all times be attached to a big strong man from Group 4.
Newspapers who circulate the filth and bile issuing from the soon to be closed houses of depravity will be put out of business or handed over to that very nice Mr. ?Digger? Murdock (check the spelling of this idiots name Alistair)
Last and not least the Internet will be closed as from ******(an achievable date her please Bumkid, make sure it?s before the next election).
Should anyone have any doubt as to the seriousness of the problems we are facing I am sure that this notice, now posted on my official web broadcasting service, will make it clear to you all that I aim to tackle this problem and by fair means or foul, win the next election. Not that we need one as Tony Rules! OK
Note to Mr. Bias (Can?t we contact that Grope 4 Lot and get some bribes..er contributions to my fighting fund? Also get Digger to send that pretty wife of his round when Cherry?s at court) Tony
By the way, who is this Violent Storm, should I meether?