Prescots stupid statement
Posted: Tue Apr 16, 2002 12:50 pm
Look here you lot. You?re worse than politicians. If we can?t have a sensible debate about my very sensible policies then I am going to have to send Mrs. Becket along to have some very strong words and put you firmly in your places.
Let me say right from the start that I have considered the possibility of Mr. McCavity as minister for fun. That was until I was given a free copy of his latest program. There is nothing to laugh at there I can tell you. Oh, and by the way, the last time he came to No.10 he skidded his motorbike from one end of Downing Street to the other and and Mr. Cook is still trying to remove the skid marks.
As for M.Allan Esq. Really, the less said the better. The last time he joined me at my holiday home on the Costa del Crumpet my drinks cupboard was left empty and my maid, well, just the opposite. (She called the brat Mike for some reason). Jose the owner of the Calahonda Palace Bar & Entertainment Complex says he is the only man he has ever seen who can drink from a bottle of Old Grouse while laying flat on his back, drunk and fast asleep. Is that any recommendation for a politician?
No I am sorry but from the pathetic list of candidates available I shall have no option, when the time comes, but to reject all the noteworthy suggestions and stick to my original idea, namely to sack everyone and be in charge of everything myself. I may enlist the help of a certain Miss Cox to administer tea and sympathy to the many famous people who I am sure will want to Curry favour with me, (Prescott, check this statement, it may not hold up under examination) and to head the House of Lords I will of course enlist the services of Lady Josephine. (Alistair, if I see ?give head? to the House of Lords in this statement, you can consider the previously discussed P45 as your only option)
Now, I must get on running the country. Someone has just told me that Mr. Bush wants me to sign some papers promising to pay for all the damage he will do when his air force bombs Barcelona in mistake for Baghdad.
Let me say right from the start that I have considered the possibility of Mr. McCavity as minister for fun. That was until I was given a free copy of his latest program. There is nothing to laugh at there I can tell you. Oh, and by the way, the last time he came to No.10 he skidded his motorbike from one end of Downing Street to the other and and Mr. Cook is still trying to remove the skid marks.
As for M.Allan Esq. Really, the less said the better. The last time he joined me at my holiday home on the Costa del Crumpet my drinks cupboard was left empty and my maid, well, just the opposite. (She called the brat Mike for some reason). Jose the owner of the Calahonda Palace Bar & Entertainment Complex says he is the only man he has ever seen who can drink from a bottle of Old Grouse while laying flat on his back, drunk and fast asleep. Is that any recommendation for a politician?
No I am sorry but from the pathetic list of candidates available I shall have no option, when the time comes, but to reject all the noteworthy suggestions and stick to my original idea, namely to sack everyone and be in charge of everything myself. I may enlist the help of a certain Miss Cox to administer tea and sympathy to the many famous people who I am sure will want to Curry favour with me, (Prescott, check this statement, it may not hold up under examination) and to head the House of Lords I will of course enlist the services of Lady Josephine. (Alistair, if I see ?give head? to the House of Lords in this statement, you can consider the previously discussed P45 as your only option)
Now, I must get on running the country. Someone has just told me that Mr. Bush wants me to sign some papers promising to pay for all the damage he will do when his air force bombs Barcelona in mistake for Baghdad.