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A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 9:55 pm
by fudgeflaps
SO.

What should I give up?? I need your help. Sarcky replies will get an electronic kick up the arse (e-bottykick).

I'm torn between:

1. The Drink.

Cons:
I've never gone without drink for a period of 40days in my puff. / Setting myself up for failure.

Pros:
Save money/ Discover the art of enjoying myself without getting too sloshed (not that i need booze to do that..)/ Will be fully fit for footie and marathon.

2. The Ladies.

Cons:
I like them/ loss of concentration and focus due to frrrrrrrustration

Pros:
Don't suffer the usual 8/10 rejection rate (its a numbers game) and retain self-esteem/ Save money (lots- on wining and dining; I don't PAY for it, I've only done that ONCE, you know who you are wink wink)/ learn to appreciate how wonderful the ladyform actually is.

3. The Self-Love.

Cons:
Tough habit to break/ I like it to the extent of quoting it on my CV as a hobby/ have to get custom-made chastity glove/ it's a natural male function, like watching football

Pros:
More personal energy/ channel denial of pleasure positively/ look forward to best orgasm EVER at the end of 40days/ have to find constructive distraction methods in the event of an amber-situation Wank Alert.

4. All of the Above.

Cons:
I'll die.

Pros:
I'll go straight to Heaven.


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 7:07 am
by Jacques
Tough call - so why not give them ALL up for lent?

No I am not mad, 10 days duration for each.


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 1:54 pm
by Jock Strap
Interesting.
They all sound difficult.

There are certain things in life I have tried to give up but simply cannot.

Porn.
The internet.
Booze.
Certain chemicals.
Junk food.


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 4:12 pm
by superior
Why give up any? U might die next week so at least go out happy and with a smile on ur face rather than as miserable as fuck! U only live once so enjoy it while u still can!

Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 5:46 pm
by fudgeflaps
Jacques', there's a bus stopping, and it's destination reads 'Cop-outsville'.

Thanks anyway- you should hide that tirade box for Lent. Nonetheless, I still want one- ebay doesn't have any. Alarmed at this shite state of affairs I wanted to open my tirade box......... but I don't have one. Vicious circle.

You speak excellent English for a Frenchman, J. Are you a Jacques of all trades? A Jacques in the (tirade) box? Or are you invading Enland to pioneer French kiddies TV, with your Cracker Jacques concept?

I've now worked out what to give up........... spouting forth the silly reaches of my imagination on forums.

Thank you God. Thank you Jacques.


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 5:52 pm
by fudgeflaps
I'm with you buddy.

Interesting you didn't mention Aberdeen FC, you fair-weather fly-by-nighter!!

'Certain chemicals':

Oxygen is a tough one to live without; nail varnish and lippy famines would spoil my life.

Moment of self-discovery: give up being a big girl.

I dunno if you've seen 'Team America: World Police', but your list sounds like the lyrics from the song 'America- Fuck, Yeah!!!!'.

seeya when i seeya, keep the pecker up*.

*with the help of Lara Lee, if need be. !wink!


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 6:11 pm
by Jacques
*Opens Triade Box*

Rio Ferdinand is a cock juggling thunder cunt. He makes me want to want to get out my big fucking sledgehammer and hit him until he is dead from dying whilst playing Ride of the Valkyries at 120 db(a) with Ashley cole sitting in a wicker chair in the corner wearing a chuppa-chupp and a roll of gaffer tape.

Looks like he gave England up for lent......wanker

/box

Yours for lent Jaques Orf.


Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 10:03 pm
by Pervert
I'm still certain you're Holden.

Re: A promise for Lent: Help!!

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 6:10 am
by Jock Strap
Aberdeen FC I will never be able to give up. A lifetime of pain and sorrow lies before me.