egafd.com

I have the flu at the moment so if I vanish in the next few days I'd just like to say it's been great knowing you all!!

Do you honestly think the Fifers are prepared to just give bird flu away? These are the people with short arms and long pockets.

Its all very well for you Jocks to make racist remarks about yourselves. The Mods would rap our knuckles.

Mart

It's okay, Mart. I've been making racist jokes about the Welsh since I first posted here.

In fact one, about so many of the Welsh losing their girlfriends on the bonfires during the foot-and-mouth crisis, was completely ignored. The equivalent then of a !tumbleweed!

Shite I just developed the flu as well guys, woke up this morning with a full set of feathers and my beek was running madly, couple of minutes later the postman delivered a mystery parcel which turned out to be my new semi-detached cage ... just hope it aint bird flu coming on.
Squak to you later guys as I am just off to have my bird seed ... must fly!!

I've just signed a contract with Mr.Fox in my garden to share his dug-out when the sirens go.
Any moment now the media will declare,inc the red tops,the end is nigh,we are all about to die,and gas masks and rubber suits will be on sale in our local supermarket.

If we fill in the coupon on the front page,we will get it 10% off normal price.

Any moment now the Page 3 girls will be covered up-too risky to expose themselves to us commoners.

My Fox has agreed to take in another resident until the heat goes out of this media crisis.Watch the skies....

TheProf.

Found a dead sparrow in the garden yesterday, rang the SAS, BBC, SBS, MI6, WI & WWE, as yet no-one has come to examine it. As I saw next doors cat playing with it just before it died, a bit concerned that if it did die of flu the cat may have it now. Would wash the area down to stop the spread of infection but have got a hose ban. It's one worry after another these days.

Jock Strap please stay north of the border and i hope you make a speedily recovery.

Don't worry,Dorrin...The men in white coats are coming for us any day now,more over crowded hospitals.The government think the general public are a nuisance anyway...so lets frighten them to death with another scare.

The next,firemen cannot use hosepipes at fires,only buckets of water,or the extreme,sand.

Please fill in form DX34B,for the use of.Regulation 75AAZ10 at your local post office (which closes next week).

Interesting to see 'binge-drinking' is the highest in this country,no wonder,those in charge are driving us to drink.

Sorry,another form to fill out...

TheProf.