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Feeling the urge I ran home to my flat, which I shared with 2 other guys. One had his posh parents visiting. They liked the nice boy image i projected whenever they were around, and so i had to delay my self love for exchanging 'how do you do's. At the earliest but politest opportunity I took my leave and laid out all my magazines on my bed at their best pages. A couple of minutes later my other flatmate burst in wanting to borrow something. From my position behind the bed he couldn't see what i was doing, but the magazines on the bed were a clear give away. He didn't get it, so I had to resort to saying "Sorry, Wayne, but I'm having a wank". He still didn't get it. I ended up shouting 'NOT NOW, I'M HAVING A WANK!'

This time he got it. He replied "Oh yes...so you are" and left the room. When I came out smiling a few minutes later it was quite clear from the pained faces of my friend's parents that they got what I was doing too.

Nice one, J.

I had similar before- the Danger-wank!!

I knew one of my flatmates was coming up the stairs (nooo...., !wink!), but I had to finish myself off quick- so I thought I would make it JUST before he entered the room.

I JUST made it; DangerWanking should be an olympic sport.

There are stories doing the rounds just now.

1. Guy comes home to celebrate birthday. Nobody there, depressed!!! So... he has a massive wank. Mid-shuffle, 25mates pop out......... SURPRISE PARTY!!! Well, it was a massive fucking surprise! !grin!

2. Teenager, having wank. Horny as. Has women's knickers over his face.

Finishes off. Comes to, pardon pun. Awaiting..... tea and toast.

His mum had entered his room, was too embarrased to run away, and left him his pre-bed snack while he was bashing it. !laugh!

the ultimate danger wank is to et hard then shout ure mum from downstairs 2 come up 2 ure room, then try and bash 1 out before she comes in!