I feel that as a very bored young drunk it is my duty to talk about King Edwards, Jersey Royals and any other tuber of the spud family that takes my fancy.
And just to bring it on topic. Which British porn star would you like to see shove a tatty up her flange?
My favourite would be Ashley Long in my local fruit and veg shop ramming a large Cyprus Potato up her flange followed by a medium sized aubergine. Then firing them out and breaking the windows