A colleague of a friend of mine had to go abroad on a business trip and made the mistake of leaving his passport on his desk when he went to lunch beforehand.
The lads just happened to have a porno mag and cut out from it an erect dick that happened to be passport photo size and stuck it over his pic in the passport.
Well you dont look inside your own passport do you?
So he arrives at passport control and hands over his passport to a lady passport control officer. She looks inside the passport, looks up at him and says
You might be a dick but you are not that big a one.