Oi! Wot you lookin' at?

[andy at handiwork]

Anything interesting at the moment?

[Pervert]

He said anything "interesting."

[Trumpton]

What this then Wazza? Are you, a Scot, watching the cricket which features Ing-gor-lund?

I hate the 'Barmy Army'.

[Pervert]

How can you hate them? I mean, they chant "barmy" and then "army"---and it rhymes. Hilarious and soooooooooo clever.

[Trumpton]

That's what I hate about it !furious!

Also, why do they "sing" 'Ing-gor-lund' to the tune of 'The Stars And Stripes Forever'? You couldn't wish to hear a more American tune.

I can't imagine American baseball fans supporting their team by singing their teams name to the tune of the 'Pomp And Circumstance March'?

[Pervert]

But you don't understand Trumpy. They are, like, an army of fans---and they're barmy! And if there are too many syllables in In-ger-land, they can always sing Barmy Army (the real advantage of which, apart from rhyming, is that if you forget any of the words, someone else might know it).

What really pisses me off is the hijacking of a spiritual hymn by the Rodneys and Nigels of the rugby world. What the f*ck do the aspirational hopes of an enslaved people have to do with the stockbroker belt?

[Trumpton]

Caractacus wrote:

> But you don't understand Trumpy. They are, like, an army of
> fans---and they're barmy!

Barmy - fucking mental cases!

[Pervert]

They could all be Scottish and that wouldn't make the game any more interesting. One-day matches I can just about cope with. Stretching it any further----and remembering I grew up at a time when there were three TV channels, next to nothing on during the day, the Beeb was cricket-fixated and Geoffrey "Let's Watch Some Paint Dry Instead" Boycott was in his heyday----and we're talking speed calls to the Samaritans.