Repair clothes/shoes the Trumpton way!

[Trumpton]

For many decades now conventional wisdom has dictated that when you have to repair clothes or shoes a person should use cotton, wool, nylon and leather patches etc.

I say tish and pish to this. I offer my own unique approach to clothes repair - the use of staples, and for the repair of shoes - the use of gaffer tape.

Example: The other day my trousers split along the arse area. 'Oh shit' I thought, 'I need to wear those trousers tomorrow'. My response, get out the stapler and by joining the two lose ends of my trousers I stapled them back together by the use of two dozen staples. What a success - although I must admit it was only temporary as by the end of the day most of staples had fallen away !blush!

Shoes are easy to repair. Just slap plenty of gaffer tape over the offending area and bob's your uncle it's done!

[Jacques]

Steps.....away......slowly.....

[jj]

Rich toff show-off.
Why don't you use chewing-gum and dried dogshite, like the rest of us?

[Trumpton]

jj wrote:

> Why don't you use chewing-gum

Chewing gum!?! I can't afford chewing gum!!!

[jj]

Neither can I- I get mine off the pavement.
All you need to do then is to wet it with a bit of gob and, kneeling on all
fours, insert a couple of nice dollps of fresh ear-wax [the runny brown sort,
not that hard yellow crap].....

[the rest of this phrase has been censored due to the obscenely biological,
not to mention probably physically impossible and definitely illegal, nature
of the process described and in order to avoid sensitive souls such as
Carac losing their [doubtless, as usual, liquid] lunches- Ed].

[Trumpton]

jj wrote:

> Neither can I- I get mine off the pavement.

Pavement!! You live in a very swanky posh area then to have access to pavements!!

[Trumpton]

magoo wrote:

> I am even posher (or should that be "more posh"). I use
> blu-tack and plasticine for my clothing repairs.

That indeed does show how classy and up-market you are!

[laralatex]

....and you have a wife???!!!

[Trumpton]

laralatex wrote:

> ....and you have a wife???!!!

If I did how long would she put up with me self repairing my clothes?