Laugh Or Cry?

[Officer Dibble]

I maintain a couple of simple websites for Escort ladies and recently one of them got an enquiry from a potential client. Well, by now I?ve seen more than a few of these e-mails, so I?m well aware of people?s foibles and insecurities. But for some reason this one made me sit up. I didn?t know whether to laugh, cry, or what. Here it is, letter for letter.

?hi my name is darren and I have not had sex in 3 years. I am disabilled and would like to fuck you but I am allergic to comdoms would yoy let me fuck with out one? if so how much for 3 hours at yours. Ps you look so sexy and fucker bull.?

All human life is here.



Officer Dibble

[diplodocus]

on a serious point he may have a latex allergy which makes his point valid about being unable to use condoms, whilst his point able not using them is dumb he may not know it's possible to get condoms made from polyurethane

mail him back saying do some research

[Mike_CFC]

Could of he been anymore subtle in his request to the escort? !laugh!

A product of Britain's 'proud' and 'efficient' education system !whistle!

[JonnyHungwell]

Tell him if he wants to fuck a bull, that would be illegal (technically) - not to mention dangerous too. Looks like they'd both have the horn!

[Mike_CFC]

Very drole Johnny,very drole

Are you here all week? !laugh!JonnyHungwell wrote:

> Tell him if he wants to fuck a bull, that would be illegal
> (technically) - not to mention dangerous too. Looks like they'd
> both have the horn!

[mrmcfister]

Probably quite a nice honest guy albeit in need of spelling lessons!

[Guilbert]

>Could of he been anymore subtle in his request to the escort?

I am not sure this sentence could be described as "A product of Britain's 'proud' and 'efficient' education system" either !wink!

[Officer Dibble]

"on a serious point he may have a latex allergy which makes his point valid about being unable to use condoms, whilst his point able not using them is dumb he may not know it's possible to get condoms made from polyurethane"

Good call, diplo. To be honest I wasn't aware of this issue at all. I just immediately thought the geezer was cack handedly trying it on for a bit of the old ?bareback? - which no truly professional lady would ever entertain. The whole thing invoked a kaleidoscope of emotions - shock, horror, anger, mirth and pathos, all in but a few ill spelt sentences. I?ll endeavor to make the relevant parties aware of the latex issue. Thanks.




Officer Dibble

[one eyed jack]

failing that Dibb he could always use a Sainsbrys bag with an elastic band...Or alternatively a sock with an elastic band.

Reminds me of an old joke you might want to tell him:

Customers says he is allergic to condoms and could he pay extra to fuck her without one.

Escort says ..Ooh I dont know. I'm worried about AIDS

Customers says...Oh dont worry I havent got anything.

Escort says...Yes well I do

If he doesnt get that then ask him if a shag is worth days of pissing hot broken glass....

Oh shit he hasnt had sex for three years.

Dont answer that one.