women advice

[davey]

My mate sent this it was a post on a site he goes on where some bloke asked advice about his bird seeing some other chappy



"For fucks sake.

Your first priority is to fucking anihilate the lad for taking the piss out of you. You're lying in bed, listening to the poignant lyrics of Lionel Richie and crying your eyes out like a soft cunt, while your mate is locking his panic up the love of your life's saltbox. Next time you see him you should steal in from the side and devastate the side of his face with a steering lock, leaving him for dead in the middle of the street.

They're laughing at you.

She's jamming his 6 inch girth into her esophagus and sliding her index finger up her copper smelling snitch, while you're looking at old photo's and moaning to strangers on the Internet. Do you realise that he goes up to her room, flops his entertainment onto the front of his undies and then beats off right next to her face as she ridicules you about your appearance? He's got a hassle pipe the size of a can of Arrid and he kettles her all over her box room before he cock coughs his Tippex all over her grill. They're fucking roaring with laughter at you. Kill the both of them.

Once she's been packed to the rafters with cock she comes back to you for some conversation and comfort. But guess what? Sexual thirst is quenched but temporarily, and once her clit gets itchy she'll be back to your mate, reversing onto his trumpet. You need to break this cycle if you want to keep the last drop of dignity that you possess. Next time you see her, just pin her to your council house work top and erupt your fuck crumbs all over her timepiece, and then sling her out without her Ugg boots.

Tell her if she ever takes the p?ss out of you again that you'll go through her ma's front door with a ballie on.

Hope this helps"

[Brainsinmedick]

Well, that's Claire Raynor for you.

[Heidi Vincent]

LMAO.....Nice one,brill! !laugh!

Heidi V.
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