How to win an election?

[David Johnson]

The question Diamond Dave and Ozzy Osborne have to find an answer to is:

How do you win an election when growth is flat, your "rebalancing of the economy" has failed completely with the gap between imports and exports as big as ever, long term unemployment rising, hundreds of thousands of public sector workers sacked, national debt spiralling out of control, deficit remaining unchanged, standards of living dropping at unprecedented levels due to the difference between wage rises and inflation rises, credit rating shot down by the ratings agencies etc. etc.?

You bribe the public!

RBS's Chairman Sir Philip Hampton said yesterday that Ozzy is determined the bank is in a state to be privatised at the end of 2014. This could be one of the reasons why Chief Executive Hester announced he was leaving the Bank. I suspect Ozzy is going for a Thatcher-like "Tell Sid" type sale of British Gas in which the public are allowed to make a few quid whilst his City chums make millions as a result of a fire sale of OUR bank, RBS.

Meanwhile, the public will be persuaded to get into even more debt than they were in at the time of the financial crash as Ozzy tries to recreate a housing price bubble with his Funding for Lending scheme which provides 20% of the finance interest free, required for new houses up to ?600K. From January taxpayers will underwrite 20% of the mortgage costs of old houses in the case of the buyer defaulting. It's only supposed to be a temporary measure, so once the government withdraws support Joe Mortgagee will be back in negative equity.

If successful in the election, back to another decade of austerity. Jeez!

[number 6]

We have the irony of an NHS being absolutely run into the ground,libraries being closed,sick people being told they have to work,police numbers being cut, cost of living going through roof,homeless numbers rocketing aka the 80's.....and while all this is going on,the media launches an all out war on the Labour party and Ed Miliband ,using every trick in the book by the tory press,the bbc,sky etc etc to make the stupid sheep to get out there and vote for the tories in 2015. The sad thing is they might succeed.

[mrchapel]

They didn't win an election though did they? Labour lost it because no one wanted the one eyed bumbling idiot brown.

[max_tranmere]

You can win an election by convincing the public the other lot are worse, even though you are crap yourself. Also knocking 3p of Income Tax just before an election, even if it means the nation is broke afterwards, always helps. Getting the Murdoch press onside is another thing to do. This is how the Tories won in 1992. Then break all your promises 3 or 4 months later, but you can laugh your arse off knowing the public can't do anything about it as they can't vote again for another 5 years.

[Arginald Valleywater]

Easy. You put a wet fart with the personality of a retarded wet fart as leader of the opposition. Boris and Theresa will be the Tory leaders by the next election and win comfortably. Now over to.....

[Gentleman]

Considering the Tories and lib dems basically put clones of tony Blair in as their leaders the idea of someone far less slimy and produced makes a pleasant change.

[mrchapel]

Not by fucking Rupert Murdochs wife apparently

[sparky]

max_tranmere wrote:

> You can win an election by convincing the public the other lot
> are worse, even though you are crap yourself. .....

You've hit the nail on the head.

For several years now at both national and local level I've feel I've had to decide who is ' the best of the worst ' rather than who I think has the right policies proposals.