Howard off Halfix TV Ads.........

[Shelley Louise]

The bloke from bargain hunt david wotsisface!

Never forget when Viz did a piss take Roger Mellie 'bargain cunt' !laugh!

[stripeysydney]

No wait, I've just remembered, Victoria beckham, she makes Terry Christian look positively talented.
If 'Osama and his nutty crew really want to get our sympathy..

[The Last Word]

Take your pick from any of the smug wankers on Mock The Week.

[Snake Diamond]

Thanks to Crofter, I've seen a pic of both Maureen Madill & Hazel Irvine.

Don't know about you Arginald, but I wouldn't touch either of them.

[Snake Diamond]

Bunch of irritating, annoying, asshole, bastard, fucking cunts.

I'd rip their balls off with a rusty chainsaw, feed their balls to each other, then I'd set fire to them, by throwing them on a Bonfire.

When they are almost burned, take them off the fire, & really let loose on them, with sulphuric acid enemas mixed with Caustic Soda, Nitro Glyscerin, 30 Lbs of Semetex, 50 stix of TNT, & 15 Lbs of C4, then for good measure, add in 5 Barrels of Dynamite, & a dozen Molotof Cocktails.

Stand (far far away), & watch the performance as the bonfire sets light to a trail of Dynamite powder, leading from the Bonfire, to them.

Yes, I know they are actors, but by fuck they drive me insane, if I ever met them cunts, I'd kill them dead the second I got near them.

[Snake Diamond]

Bunch of irritating, annoying, asshole, bastard, fucking cunts.

I'd rip their balls off with a rusty chainsaw, feed their balls to each other, then I'd set fire to them, by throwing them on a Bonfire.

When they are almost burned, take them off the fire, & really let loose on them, with sulphuric acid enemas mixed with Caustic Soda, Nitro Glyscerin, 30 Lbs of Semetex, 50 stix of TNT, & 15 Lbs of C4, then for good measure, add in 5 Barrels of Dynamite, & a dozen Molotof Cocktails.

Stand (far far away), & watch the performance as the bonfire sets light to a trail of Dynamite powder, leading from the Bonfire, to them.

Yes, I know they are actors, but by fuck they drive me insane, if I ever met them cunts, I'd kill them dead the second I got near them.

[Snake Diamond]

magoo wrote:

> I think you need to chill out a bit Snakey. Yes they are
> irritating clit-warts of the worst kind but surely the
> dreadfull death you wish upon them should be reserved for
> Edmonds.

Noel Edmonds is ok, sometimes I find he can be irritating, but the worst scum is 118 118. Whenever there is an interesting Programme/Drama/Film on CH5, what do I get, them fucking irritating cunts on the beginning & end of every god damned fucking advert break/segment of said programme/drame/film/etc. Arrrrrrrrr, makes you want to go out & kill some1.

> Anyway forget the sticks of TNT. Peroxide and chapati flour is
> all the rage these days.

Peroxide and chapati flour, what does that make? Blonde Indian Food? LOL


Yes, people might say that I have an Anger Management Issue (I have been told that very same thing in the past), but if you don't get stuff off of your chest thats built up, it's only gonna do you harm later in life, & a good daily rant helps clear out your system.

[Snake Diamond]

magoo wrote:

> How can you say Edmonds is ok? Hes a proper cunt and a shitbag
> nonce fanny-batter collector. He is a tit and a glob of mucous.

Don't know much about his personal life, but I find some of his presenting of proggy's in the past mildly ok.

Nonce, yeah I gather that's ref to Paedo, but Fanny Batter? Is that some kind of pre-pubescent vaginal liquid? That's a new phrase to me.

> Yes I agree its good to vent ones spleen every now and then.

Yeah, your spleen is not meant to explode with agression, better to let the fumes "vent". !grin!

> Hope your anger management gets sorted. If not chin the fucking
> therapist.

I don't have a therapist, if I did I'd prolly try to kill him/her.

I have personal experience of Psycho-therapists, & their Ilk, from when I was a young-un, fucking smarmy lil bastards, try reckoning peoples "issues" are stemming from:

not enough breast as a baby
mommy & or daddy didn't love you enough, or mistreated you, as a child
do you have any sexual urges that you need to see some1 about
you have unresolved issues from when you were a child
blah blah blah...

eat shit & die, fucking deal with it.

I'm Dyslexic, I also suffer with Erlas Syndrome, & Auditory Dysfunctia, as well as having partial Autism as a child.

Cunt's trying to say it's all because of being lazy, not having the "right attention as a child" & not interacting on the correct level with people of your own age as a child.

So fucking what if my way of viewing people/situations is unique, it's my way. If I'm wrong about anything, prove me wrong in "black and white", then I'll appologise/change my view.

At least I'm upfront & can say what I think/feel/view, & not be some namby pamby nancy boy, too scared to say anything incase any PC Brigade might get their feelings hurt.

OK, I think I've had enough ranting for today, who's got some funny jokes, or anything else to cheer up the situation, LOL.

!grin! !grin! !grin!