AAARRRGGGHHHH ... it's Children in Need!

[Terry May]

Once again a decent night in front of the telly is ruined by a bunch of attention grabbing c-listers trying to get their mug on the telly all in the name of charideee m'darlin.

Just watch as people who you wouldn't see in a month of Sundays suddenly appear to do their bit. Butchering Broadway classics, limping through piss poor dance routines, interviewing some arse sitting in a bath of baked beans. If they wanted to sit naked in beans its not because its an ordeal for them its because they WANT to sit naked in a bath of baked beans. If you want my sponsership then they should eat them afterwards too!

So what have we got to look forward to tonight? That fat knacker Barry from eastenders bellowing out a Barry White song. Gobby Roslin interrupting Wogan, the ginger gnome Anthony Worral Thompson and that hyperactive black & white minstrel Ainsley Harriot displaying their utter lack of comic timing as they piss all over any happy memories we had of a great Morecambe & Wise sketch - for fucks sake is nothing sacred? and Donny Osmond! Donny bloody Osmond! Has no one told him it isn't 1973 any more? And what's the crowning turd on this whole shambolic tribute to amateur night? Shane Richie and other soap star shits singing a Wham song! Why do I bother to pay a licence fee is anyone's guess!

Worse still they get reputable and distinguished experts to act like an arse! Usually news and currnet affairs journalists! I'm still trying to erase from my mind the sight of Jeremy Vine in womens underwear singing from Rocky Horror. How does he expect to retain any credibility when he he looked like a reject drag act is beyond me! Surely it can't be long before the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse turn up.
But hey its all for charidee!!

And that bloody bear!!! How many years has it been going on and still his eye isn't any better!!

Sorry I'm starting to froth at the mouth now!!
Oh sod it I'm going to the pub!

[Bronson Lee]

So turn over or read a book !

I must admit I loved the bit when Joanna Lumley stripped down to her undies (black lace and stockings).... back in the 80's .........I never phoned in any cash cos I knew she would do it anyway .......

[Terry May]

so the last decent thing on CIN was 20 years ago.

[Bronson Lee]

er........ yes ......... er....... I see your point .

[steve56]

i was hoping pam stephenson would have flashed her tits on a cin edition but to no avail i had 20 quid in my pocket just in case,that was 1981?

[Knave Editor]

Terry May, I salute you!

Well bloody said. Children in Need is as tiresome and annoying as Comic Relief. What is it, ?30 - ?40 million raised every year and still the same problems happen. Where does the fucking money go? On fat cat salaries for the chief executives who run these charities.

"ahh, but it's only one night a year, and think of all the sick little kiddies who need your money"

FUCK OFF!

[steve56]

that terry wogan must be a millionaire now,lol.

[Zorro]

CIN is on the box, thank god I have an excuss to go to bed early and prepare myself for England vs Australia tomorrow.

I will leave you with my favourite Aussie bashing joke at the moment:

An Englishman, an Aussie and a South African are in a bar one night,
having a beer. All of a sudden the South African downs his beer,
throws his glass in the air, pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to
pieces and says: "In Sath Efrika our glasses are so cheap that we
don't need to drink from the same one twice." The Aussie, obviously
impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air,
pulls out his gun and shoots the glass to pieces and says: "Well
mate, in 'Straaaaailia we have so much sand to make the glasses that
we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either." The
Englishman, cool as a cucumber, picks up his beer and drinks it,
throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun, shoots the South
African and the Australian and then says: "In London we have so many
f***ing South Africans and Aussies that we don't need to drink with
the same ones twice."

[Bronson Lee]

LOL ..... she had a great pair ! she got em out for Robin Askwith (lucky bastard ! in some film ( not a confess though)

[Pervert]

The dreadful Stand Up Virgin Soldiers.