Is the Universe bipolar?

[colonel]

Two hydrogen atoms have a chat.

One says: 'Are you sure you've lost an electron?'

The other says: 'Yes- I'm positive'.

[WoodWhacker]

I can eat 2 lollies at once - does that make me bi-polar?

or is it when you shag a polar bear but you're a hetero male?

I use to be schizophrenic but we're better now