The awesome power of Becks!

[jimslip]

I love the way the tabloids have elevated David Beckam to some kind of all powerful super hero. In the Sun today in respect to the allegation of some hooker, the paper gravely announced, "Becks has ordered a global hunt for 26 year old Irma Nici!" I mean, who has he ordered? MI5, the CIA? The SAS? He has also issued a writ for ?5million, well he may as well as issued it for ?5 trillion since the poor girl probably hasn't got 2 farthings to rub together. Any watch out for tanks at Heathrow and road blocks, as Becks has obviously mobilised the World's superpowers to, "Hunt for the Slapper" sound like a film like, "Hunt for the Red October." LOL

[Essex Lad]

Yes it's a typical tabloid overreaction.

I love it when they say "TV bosses last night were desperately trying to contact xxx" - have the TV bosses never thought of landlines, mobiles, faxes, texts or failing that simply going round and knocking on the front door?

[jimslip]

I think if Churchill had had Becks at his side and maybe Posh to restyle the British Army uniforms, we could have shortened WW2 by three years. I also reckon Becks could solve World poverty, if he was only given the chance!

[jimslip]

Allegedly, Becks is so desperate to locate the" Slapper of Bosnia" to prove his inncence, he is forming a crack team of specialists and has ordered them to, "Find her and bring her to me NOW!"
All applicants must be confined to a wheelchair, deaf, dumb and blind and preferably serving a life sentence in prison! !wink!

[Arginald Valleywater]

Really who gives a flying fuck?

[Jonone]

Perhaps he's mobilized the forces of the War On Terror to find this girl ? In Becks' mind she's as despicable as Osama.

[Random Blerk]

You might appreciate this article Jim:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog ... -celebrity

In times gone by he might have ran a pub after hanging up his clogs. Now it looks like he's joined celebrity royalty.

[jimslip]

I mean to say, what an outrageous slur on the "Saintly" good name of, "Our Becks", King of Hearts! To suggest that a footballer would have an illicit threesome with 2 girls of the night, is shocking beyond measure!
Becks should mobilise the forces of Interpol and enlist his good mates Bono and Gok Wan to help him find this BITCH and silence her!

[jimslip]

This story just keeps getting funnier, apparently Becks was "Incandescent with rage" because the Slapper simply smiled when she was handed his writ of ?16,000,000 (It was ?5million a few days ago, I expect it will be ?100 million by the weekend!)

Presumably, she should have cowered with fear when faced with the simply AWESOME POWER OF BECKS! !laugh!

Also he went "Mad with fury" and tore his shirt off, (Like the Incredible Hulk) when accosted in the tunnel to the LA Galaxy pitch by a person shouting, "Enough with the prostitutes, already, Becks!"

Posh was lead away shortly afterwards by security!!laugh! (I made this bit up!)