A professional shoot

[rgb]

Did a shoot with Elizabeth Michelle Lawrence today.

She arrives and struggles down the path with about 6 bags, make-up boxes etc. I rush out the front door to help her. Door slams shut behind me. Locked out. No problem I think. I've got my keys in my pocket, I'll open the back door. But...I've left the key in the lock inside the back door and I can't get the other key in from the outside. Shit. I know! - the patio door - I've got a key to that on the key ring - same thing - key is in the lock inside - can't get the outside key in. Go back to the front door. Elizabeth is standing there just driven 60 miles surrounded by her paraphernalia - her expression says "Who is this prat" . "Do you have a plan," she says. "Ermmmm," I say. Rush back to the other side of the house and bump into my next door neighbour. "Hallo Richard," he says, "hows things, we haven't a had a chat for ages - what are you doing for Christmas" "Fuck off!" Find a large piece of tree trunk lying about the garden - smash open the back door. Enter the house and let her in the front door as suavely as I can manage.

Shoot is going very well when the window cleaner arrives. Elizabeth is on the sofa with about 10 inches of giant dildo up her. Pull all the curtains quickly. Sit quietly for a while until he finishes. Window cleaner rings doorbell to get his money. Elizabeth says "I'm desperate for a pee" . "Hold it," I say, "we need it for the pee scene". "I can't hold it long," she says...

Window cleaner: "Crikey it's parky out there, Richard, mind if I come in - Oh it's another 50p this week, it's gone up. Rush back in to get some coins and find Elizabeth looking desperate with her legs crossed. "Just another couple of minutes," I say. Back to the window cleaner to give him his money. "Richard, can I ask you something about Christmas..." "No, fuck off!"

Back to find Elizabeth about to wet herself - need to find another light to put in the kitchen for a quick stand up pee scene - just in time - good scene - whole mug full.

Elizabeth was very sweet about everything. Waved her goodbye. She left her diary behind.

I'm putting a lot of effort into this site, please bookmark it

[tas]

Lol, that is funny. After reading that I am suprised you ever make it when we meet up for a pint.

[rgb]

So am I. Got to repair the bloody back door tomorrow...

[Joe A]

Tas..

RGB makes it for a drink as I think he needs it.. LOL.

And RGB.. Good luck with the new site.. It's lookin' good

See ya both on the 9th no doubt.... Like we'd miss a piss up

[rgb]

Thanks Joe, I've just put a bottle of Semillon Chardonnay to good use. Look forward to seeing you again on the 9th.

[LaraLee]

Awww bless you Rgb thats so funny, I still laugh when I think of you forgetting where my house was and nearly went into next door instead hahaha!!!

[rgb]

Thanks for reminding me of that Lara... I didn't really forget, I just had the house number incorrectly noted.

[Cenobitez]

Been There Done That have the hole in the bank account to prove it

Something that may or may not be of interest you know those lil screw in hooks that look like an L, screw em in to the door frame near the curtain outta sight from the outsite and use that to hook your keys on works miracles for me

[LaraLee]

Hehehe!!! Yeah yeah!! Lol!! Sorry rgb ;o)

[Poppy Morgan]

Richard is it...

What a funny story. would of loved to have been there!

Poppy x